Luna Stellar Soul

Luna Stellar Soul
Happy dog

Tuesday, February 11, 2014

So long for now..... I love you too too much!

This last year has brought a lot of loss. First my dear father in law "Lloyd Myron Leckness" Born in 1916. And left this world on September 18th 2013. Then just three weeks ago, my sweet daddy "Clyde Eugene Smith" born in 1923 and left us on January 16th 2014, just three weeks shy of his 91st birthday. I've always heard that losing a parent is a strange, painful and forever changing part of our journey here on earth. I can now attest to that. But being a person of gratitude and always finding the silver linings in life. How blessed I have been to have both of these men for nearly 55 years! True blessing.
Through the love of this amazing animal, we have touched many life's. Both of these dearly departed men lived out the last part of their journey in nursing facilities. On our (almost) daily visits, Luna was always in tow. She brought so much joy to so many residents, some without one visitor EVER! When my dad was tired, or in pain or frustrated Luna would lay with him and his fears, his anxieties would just melt away right before my eyes. And it was so incredible that it usually brought tears to my eyes! The morning my father took his last breath, I was there within 15 minutes of receiving "the call". As we walked into the room, I prepared myself to see him laying in his bed physically present but his soul out of his body. Luna saw him and barked twice. She never had done that before. One of the aids was from Africa and immediately said "perhaps your father was still here in the room?"  Something to ponder I guess? She felt something, no doubt in my mind or in my heart.
We continue to visit because although my daddy is gone, the residents we have met and spent so much time with are still there. Luna continues to bring joy, give kisses, and just do what she does best, LOVE.
Last week my sisters and I traveled to Maui Hawaii to honor our father's last wish. To scatter his earthly remains in his favorite place on earth. He loved life, golf, sun, fun, and family gatherings. It was such an emotional, cathartic and loving experience. I'm still in awe that we were able to fulfill his wish. So blessed. There is never "goodbye" but rather "So long for now" for my dad and Lloyd albeit physically gone from our lives, I can feel them with me everyday. My dad used to tell us "I love you too too much" Well daddy.... I love you too! Too too too too too too much! God bless you both, love your daughter and daughter in law. And of course Luna!

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

rich versus RICH

This feeling is overwhelming! I now know what it truly feels like to feel and be rich. This is coming from a woman who lost her job (misplaced it I guess) which she loved nearly six years ago!! The struggles, the raging emotions, the shift in my body, the pain, the "going without" the growing older. ALL OF IT! And I feel so good. I'm so incredibly grateful, I'm fulfilled, I am RICH.
I know that this journey was a part of the big plan. Without these bumps in the road, I would not have done or met nearly all of the people I have met since April 2006. Luna has helped me along the way with her PURE love of life and her undying love for me. Blessed.......

Thursday, February 2, 2012

Sweet Caroline Weintraub

It's been a year since I've written and no real reason for my absenteeism either. I could say I was working too much, or playing too much, or broke all of my fingers in a horrible accident so I couldn't type. Was kidnapped by Gypsy's. But none of it would be true. It's just life. And in a blink of an eye, a year goes by. Whooooooosh
Yesterday at the Horizon House I said my goodbyes to my sweet girl Caroline. I knew she wouldn't be on this earth for much longer. She had what is called the "death rattle" yesterday. It is a sound that occurs when someone is near death and the saliva accumulates in their throat and it becomes harder to swallow. I rubbed her head and her hands and told her to just "let go". And hours later she drifted into an eternal sleep. Here's a teeny bit of what I knew about Caroline.
When she first arrived at Horizon House she lived independently upstairs. She just happened to be Lorraine's neighbor (I wrote about Lorraine's passing last year). One day Lorraine heard distress coming from Carolines apartment and called for help. Caroline had suffered a stroke. One that would allow her to live, but without a voice or her independence. She now had to move downstairs to the "supported living" floors. And was unable to speak. It never really was an issue with us because we never needed to communicate by speaking when Luna and I would visit her. She loved animals and loved to read. I would bring her "Jon Katz" books about his dogs and his experiences with his dogs. She loved our visits and so did Luna and I.  Talking was not necessary! But anyone that knows me, knows I love to talk. And I love to learn about people and their life, history etc.... It frustrated Caroline that she couldn't tell me all I wanted to know!! So one day when we arrived in her room for our weekly visit, she was beside herself with excitement. She reached into her walker's front pocket and pulled out about eight 3 x 5 cards with writing on them. She handed them to me. I read them aloud and this is what they said:
"Born April 11th 1918 in New York
Grew up in Hackensack New Jersey
Attended Columbia University
Worked on Wall Street as a Corporate law secretary. And commuted daily from Hackensack
During World War II she worked with the American Red Cross as a volunteer in Alaska & Hawaii
In 1965 she moved to San Diego and lived in a house overlooking the ocean.
Moved to the Grosvenor House in Seattle
Then moved into the Horizon House
Dedicated to loving and caring treatment of animals
Belonged and donated to PETA and the Delta Society"
Loves to read
blue sweaters
cream puffs 

This was all transposed by me just as it was written. Very vague info, and no idea as to who "filled" in the blanks. But grateful for a little piece of Caroline's extraordinary life. Today I remember Caroline, I'm grateful for our friendship, and I  honor the life of Caroline Winetraub. 

(The picture above is Caroline, myself and Maggie. My dear friend Tim's dog. Tim tagged along one day and took some amazing photo's)

Rest in Peace sweet girl......

Thursday, December 23, 2010


Had a visit from a girl friend all the way from sunny Florida. She and her two 11 year old twin girls graced our home with laughter, love and life. We decorated the tree, shared a meal and toured the Pike Place Market in the city.
This time of the year always and should bring people together. Families in crisis, old friends, the old, the young, the employed and those that have nothing. Reach out and give someone your "time" your "love". That's what it is all about........

Monday, December 6, 2010

Ask and you shall receive

Our local ski area opened up this past weekend and we were on the slopes Saturday and Sunday!! Sunny, cold, good dry snow. Just not quite enough of it this early on. If always feels so good to have the wind on your face and the glow that follows. It's one of the places that my husband and I really enjoy "together". We own a tiny condo up across the street from the ski area. Mornings are spent laying in bed sipping tea or coffee and reading all the material that piled up during the week. Anything but bills. Circulars, magazines, new books, Christmas cards etc.. Then a quick bowl of oatmeal, some yoga poses and full body stretches and we hit the slopes!! Now with Luna we get back and take her out for a walk. She loves the snow. Yesterday we walked up into the valley. Usually we are unable to do this particular hike because back country skiers are coming out of the valley and it can get pretty treacherous with skiers coming at you full speed. But with the back country still closed it was just snowshoe rs and hikers. Luna roots, runs, flings snow up into the air and runs like the wind. So fun to watch and warms my heart. And always brings a smile to our faces.
A daily practice for me is gratitude. Remembering all the things I'm forever grateful for. Not the lack of, or the need of. But shifting my thinking into believing that I have more than enough. I lack or need nothing.
We have on the average 60,000 thoughts a day. Because my "current reality" is being unemployed, it is a daily practice to shift my thinking and think of nothing but prosperity, abundance, pure happiness and love. We all attract what we have thought about into our lives, period. Imagine what you want in your life. See it as yours, whatever that may be. Convince your mind, your thoughts that you already have "received". What does that feel like? Take that feeling and run with it. "What you think about, you bring about". It's amazing what our minds and thoughts are capable of. The "Placebo" effect for example. If someone tells you to take this pill it will cure what ails you. And you take it. And because of the predominant thought is "if I take this I will be cured" you in effect, cure yourself with nothing but your thoughts!! Amazing.... really. I was watching a Holiday movie while up at the condo and saw another famous (yet never think about) quote. "Ask and you shall receive" Where do you think these came from? How about the Genie in the bottle? "Your wish is my command" BELIEVE! Shift your thinking into FEELING like you have already recieved. THINK it into your life! Anything, anytime, anywhere. This is a magical time of the year. Let's all BELIEVE and let's all find someone to help or serve. Giving is one of the fastest ways to get into thinking your way to happiness, good health and abundance.
Tonight we decorate the tree with my friend Christine here from Florida and her two 11 year old twin girls. Life is good.........

Thursday, December 2, 2010

Eat, Stray, Poop

One day a week when I'm not flying I volunteer at our local Humane Society. When I arrived this morning they were off loading a truck load of little doggies from Los Angeles California. This is the 4th or 5th truckload from L.A. since January. Apparently all the Hollywood starlets are tired of their  "pocket" dogs, but the ignorant greedy breeders continue to breed them! There were 3 to 4 dogs to a kennel. Crying, cold, dirty and frightened. Once processed they were transferred to these kennels. They will now be thoroughly examined by the on sight veterinarian, behavioral tested, fed, bathed, and cuddled. Then one day very soon, they will be up for adoption and looking for their "forever" family.
I wasn't able to do this kind of "service" prior to rescuing Luna. I remember once going through volunteer training for our local Hospice. I got half way through the training and had to bail. I was an emotional wreck! I felt like such a loser for not being able to help. Luna has enabled me to serve, to be strong and to bring joy to peoples life's. In life and in death. Why? I'm not quite sure, except for I think she rescued me. I was at such a sad, gloomy, vulnerable place when Stella died. I had lost my job, and lost my "mojo" too. I just couldn't find ME. She brought me back to my happy place and back to ME.
So when people say to me "how do you volunteer there? I could never do it. I'd want to take them all home" And I say..... "it's not easy, but they need me and they could use you too!" Truth is is that I'm so busy the whole time I'm there, I'm focused on getting things done and cleaned up. Dogs walked, kennels cleaned, beds laundered, dog dishes washed, garbage emptied, an occasional bath, and cuddle. All done by donations, volunteers and very dedicated hard working animal loving people.
Thanks Luna!!

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Good bye dear friends..... rest in peace

I write today, not so much about my life because of my dog, but more about just LIFE. This photo is of my dear childhood friend Elaine (on the left) Kelli, and me on the right. We were in High School here in Kirkland about 1977. Elaine passed away yesterday peacefully with her daughter and husband close by. Ending her long battle with cancer. About an hour after hearing the news of Elaine's passing, I got a call that another dear friend had succumb to brain cancer. Then another 30 minutes later yet another call. Ralph "Biff" Niehaus passed away at the ripe old age of 94. He was like a father to me since we met back in the mid 80's. He had 8 children and a gazillion grand kids. He played professional football back when they wore leather helmets! His one true love was Gertrude (Trudy) his loving wife who passed much too young back in 1977. Years ago I rescued (more like stole) a little Springer Spaniel (about 6 mos old) who was being beaten with a bat by her ignorant drunk owner. I waited until he passed out, and climbed over the fence in the middle of a wintry night and brought her home with me. Her name was Maggie. She was a love. So so sweet but you couldn't raise your voice around her because she would shake violently and lay as flat and as still as she possibly could. Long story short, Biff ended up with Maggie living with him in Reading Ohio. He was living alone and loved Maggie's company. When it came time for Maggie to leave this world (at 16 years old) Biff called me and through his tears asked me if he was "doing the right thing". She lived out the rest of her years as his constant companion, his friend, his everything. They went for car rides, walks and when I would go back for visits, she would see me and come running. I would get the most precious kisses, then she would look back at Biff and retreat to his side.
Last night when I knelt next to my bed to pray for the three friends who had left us. Luna was laying next to me in her bed. I cried as I spoke out loud saying goodbye (for now) to these amazing souls. I felt somber, but at peace. I curled up with Luna for a minute in her gigantic Costco bed. As I wrapped an arm around her to say good night she exhaled one very long breath and I could feel her body lie in "Savasana" (dead pose in yoga). Her body totally supported by the earth and not a thought in her head. With that as a reminder, I crawled up into my bed and tried to do the same.